Bride’s MIL Hijacks Wedding Weekend and Excludes Bride From Family Photos, Then Asks Her Friends To Wear Wedding Dresses to the Ceremony

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Nov 2, 2024 4:00 PM EDT

You know the deal with weddings. The day should be one of the most special days of your life, you should prioritize the love you share with your partner, nobody should try to make your wedding all about them, blah blah blah! Brides know the drill—why can't guests get with the program?

This should be a common understanding between anyone who attends a wedding at this point, but it seems like a lot of mothers-in-law won't let their sons get married without throwing a fit. A lot of mothers cannot fathom that their children have priorities that don't include them, which typically results in some kind of spiteful theatric event. Unfortunately, sometimes theatrics are necessary so folks can understand that somebody should, in the future, be on the "Do NOT Invite" list.

The bride in this story is dealing with an entitled MIL who tries to take over and undo all of the plans the bride and groom made for their wedding weekend. First, the MIL decides to exclude the bride from family photographs during their rehearsal dinner. Then, rumor has it that MIL dearest told her friends to wear wedding dresses/white dresses to the ceremony. Even after being asked if she'd like to give a speech, twice, the MIL declines (but then springs a lengthy speech on everyone during the reception). It all seems too intentional. What do you think? More entitlement ensues, so scroll below so you can get all of the insane details.

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    "MIL asked all of her friends to wear wedding dresses/white dresses to our wedding."
    via Unsplash+ (Karolina Grabowska)
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    In-Laws made changes day of without asking the bride or groom
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    My wedding was about a month ago and the more I reflect on it, the more embarrassed I get. Before the wedding, there was a lot of drama. I was hoping it would all come
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    together for the wedding and everyone would get over it. They did not. My in-laws asked to pay for the rehearsal and we were very thankful of that. They then decided
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    to not tip any vendors for the rehearsal which made me have a panic attack in the bathroom during the event. My in-laws then proceeded to take "family photos" during the
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    rehearsal dinner AND DID NOT INCLUDE ME. I was sitting at the table next to where the pictures being taken and was not asked to join. I even stood up at one point and asked my parents what I should do
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    and they were appalled. I have no pictures of myself from the rehearsal or rehearsal dinner. On the day of the actual wedding, MIL decided to pay the DJ to change the mother-son dance from
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    what her and her son had picked out to an upbeat dance song without telling my husband, who hates dancing. He was very uncomfortable with this decision.
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    MIL also decided to give a speech last minute that she had not prepared. We had actually asked her at least two times if she wanted to give a speech at the wedding and she
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    declined every time. She told our wedding planner she was going to give a speech and our wedding planner said that she needed approval from the bride and groom. I was never consulted by MIL.
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    The worst part is that MIL asked all of her friends to wear wedding dresses/white dresses to our wedding. Luckily, only one did. It was silver so not white but definitely a wedding dress. MIL wore
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    a very very pale blue dress that was basically white. My friends all came up to me asking why there were two other people in wedding dresses (MIL and her best friend)
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    Overall, I felt ignored as the bride and hurt that everyone allowed this to happen, even when I expressed that my feelings were hurt.
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    Edit: my husband has been very supportive of me through this. Sort of insane to assume he did not do anything after all of that. I was mentioning issues with MIL not with husband. He is just as upset if not more upset than me about this. He
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    had never seen this side of her until we got together so it has been hard for him. Harder than it is on me. Obviously he has had countless conversations with her. Again, this is my perspective of MIL, not on husband.
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    No_Equ... 1d ago • She asked her friends to wear wedding dresses?! I would go no contact so fast.
    via No_Equipment5509
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    gobsmacked247 1d ago • • That was just a warning shot. This cow is gearing up for a lifetime of making you miserable. Do not let the fact that your parents raised you better stop you from checking her. She is going to show up at your house uninvited. Do not let her in. She is going to have family gatherings
    via gobsmacked247
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    where something will be said or done to exclude you. She gets one bite at that apple. After that, either stop going or put yourself in the midst (with your husbands knowledge.) Things will get even worse when kids come along. She has shown you who she is. Plan accordingly!!!
    via gobsmacked247
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    ItJustWontDo242 • 1d ago This marriage is going to crumble fast if the two of you don't grow backbones and start standing up to your in-laws, your husband especially.
    via ItJustWontDo242
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    emr830 • 1d ago • MIL decided this was her wedding, not yours. Her wedding to her son. EW. I'd either limit or completely cut contact. If you two have kids, I'd bet good money that she'd want to play mommy. More EW.
    via emr830
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    But have a serious talk with your husband before you even start actively trying for kids, or even think about trying. Use the Fort Knox of birth control until he wises up. Also ask him why he allowed any of this to happen. He should have shut this down so fast but... nope.
    via emr830
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    LooseConnectio... • 1d ago Well, off to a bad start I would say. MIL is not likely to improve, and if/when you have children, expect even more boundary stomping.
    via LooseConnection2

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family drama aita marriage entitled parents drama wedding drama mother attention seeking wife attention selfish reddit story family feud marriage-drama husband wedding entitled people karma mother in law entitled Reddit married weddings entitled people
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